Personal perspectives on dementia

Stacy Crawford, owner of Klear Water Coaching and Wellness, cares for her mother who suffers from dementia. She shares her story and offers what she has learned.

“Every story is different,” Stacy reminds us.

“It really became clear when my father passed away. That’s pretty common. For so many people, and I think he was unintentionally sort of covering for things. My mom has really gone through a lot of different versions of herself in this disease.”

“I’m really fortunate. She’s really sort of become a little more calm and easy to work with.”

Stacy recently moved her mom from Florida to Duluth, which has been successful.

Stacy’s full list of tips:

1. Live IN the moment, this is all that those with dementia can do
2. Stop trying to reason, logic is not in play here
3. Stop arguing – this makes it harder on you and on them
4. Use the Alzheimer’s hotline: 1.800.272.3900 – 24/7
5. Get POA paperwork, checking accounts or guardianship and collect insurance, long term care information in order. Consider consulting with an elder law attorney.
6. Don’t promise truth – “fiblets” or “therapeutic fibbing” helps bypass anxiety for folks. They cannot process or make big decisions on their own.
7. Get a homecare assessment. This is usually ordered by a primary care physician or neurologist that has diagnosed cognitive impairment.
8. Get a med assessment. Meds are everything and can help with challenging behaviors and agitation.
9. Confabulation is real – this is a partially made up story from the person with dementia that could be true but may not be and it is confusing to know what the truth is AND it may not matter, it just is
10. Check out Teepa Snow on YouTube, she is fun and provides real perspectives that normalize what is happening
11. Do not demonize memory care placements. There are many beautiful and honorable facilities.
12. The 36 Hour Day book